Last night, I slept peacefully, but something happened that completely disturbed my sleep. Just before I woke up, I had a dream that felt so real. In that dream, my Pappa’s father had found a groom for her, didn’t accept our love, and asked her to marry the person he had chosen. The part that hurt me the most was that, in my dream, my Pappa agreed to it.
The moment I heard those words, I suddenly woke up. For a few seconds, I couldn’t even understand whether it was a dream or reality. My heart was beating fast, and I immediately grabbed a bottle of water beside me and finished the whole bottle. I sat quietly for a few minutes trying to calm myself down, and after realizing it was only a dream, I somehow managed to fall asleep again.
A Peaceful Morning
Today, I had no plans to go to the gym. I woke up around 6:40 A.M., freshened up, and went downstairs. By the time I reached the ground floor and found a place to sit, my Pappa called me. The moment I saw her name on my screen, the fear from the dream slowly disappeared.
We started talking as usual and shared everything that had happened over the weekend. We laughed at a few random topics, and then I shared a few thoughts regarding the rumour she had told me about yesterday. I advised her not to overthink it and to be careful about whom she trusts because I didn’t want unnecessary rumours to affect her peace of mind. The conversation was calm, light-hearted, and enjoyable.
Soon, she reached her office, and we ended the call. Even after speaking with her, I still felt tired because I hadn’t slept properly after that dream. So I went back to my room and slept again.
I woke up around 10:00 A.M., and my roommate was still sleeping, so I woke him up as well. I quickly went to the bathroom, took a shower, got dressed, and by the time I came out, my roommate went in to get ready. Meanwhile, we ordered dosa for breakfast.
Around 12:00 P.M., I had a demo meeting scheduled, so I went downstairs, opened my laptop, and joined the meeting. Before the meeting started, I already knew one thing—it would probably take a long time, which meant I might miss talking to my Pappa during her lunch break. I was a little disappointed thinking about it.
Thankfully, the meeting ended much earlier than I expected. By the time it ended, my Pappa had already finished her lunch and returned to the office, so without wasting any time, I called her. We could only speak for around three to five minutes because she had already gone back to work. Before ending the call, I asked her, “Call me during your next break,” and she agreed.
After that, I went to have my lunch—or rather, brunch—because I had already eaten the dosa we ordered in the morning. Once I finished eating, I returned to my work and continued with my pending tasks.
Even though I was working, my mind wasn’t completely focused. Half of my mind was on my laptop, while the other half was waiting for my Pappa’s call because I knew she would get another break later in the day. I kept waiting for that moment.
Later, she informed me that she and her colleagues were going to a nearby tea shop. I didn’t have any problem with that because office life can become stressful, and a small tea break with colleagues is always refreshing. I simply expected one thing—I thought that once she returned to the office, she would call me.
So I waited. After some time, she texted me saying that she had come back to the office and was sitting with her colleagues. That message disappointed me, not because she was with them, but because I had specifically asked her to call me during her break. I waited a little longer, hoping she would call, but she didn’t.
Finally, I asked her directly if she could call me, and only then did she call. Honestly, I don’t know whether she called because she wanted to or simply because I asked her to. That thought stayed in my mind.
We started talking normally, and I tried my best to keep the conversation light. But suddenly she said she would call me later. I asked, “Are you going back to the office?” She replied that she was going to sit with her colleagues.
At that moment, I felt disappointed again. A question entered my mind: “Am I becoming boring for her?” I didn’t want to think like that, but when someone you love is the person you wait for the entire day, even small moments start affecting you more than they should.
I ended the call with frustration. A few minutes later, I couldn’t keep everything inside anymore, so I texted her asking her to call me. She called, and this time I opened my heart completely.
I told her, “I’m not asking you not to spend time with your colleagues. Please spend time with them, talk to them, and enjoy your break. I’m never going to stop you from doing that. But from morning until evening, you’ve been with them. If your break itself is almost an hour, can’t you spend at least fifteen or twenty minutes talking to me? That’s all I’m asking.”
I wasn’t asking her to choose between me and her colleagues. I was only asking for a little time because that was enough for me. Unfortunately, she became upset too, and instead of solving the misunderstanding immediately, it slowly turned into an argument. She ended the call while she was angry.
To be honest, at that moment, I felt like I should have been the one who was angry. But somehow, the situation became the complete opposite.
After the call ended, I texted her and explained that I wasn’t asking her to stop talking to anyone. I only wanted a little time with her because throughout my day, I keep waiting for those few moments we get to speak. I also told her that whenever her call comes, I immediately leave whatever I’m doing unless I’m in an important meeting. Even if my colleagues are around me, I either move away or find a quiet place because speaking with her is important to me.
For me, she comes before everything else. She explained her side too and said she wasn’t intentionally ignoring me. She told me they were spending time together, she thought we could talk later, and she didn’t want to leave her colleagues abruptly.
As our conversation continued, both of us slowly started understanding each other’s perspective. After a while, she started apologizing and sent “Sorry” multiple times. Seeing that hurt me even more because I’ve told her countless times before that I never want her to apologize to me.
To me, she isn’t just my girlfriend. She is my future and the woman I have already accepted as my wife in my heart. Why should my wife apologize to me again and again? I told her the same thing once more: “Please don’t say sorry to me.”
I explained that I wasn’t angry because she spent time with her colleagues. I was upset because I had been waiting the whole day just to spend a few minutes talking to her. She also said that she didn’t understand my feelings properly at first and thought I was angry because she was with her colleagues. But that wasn’t my point at all—my only wish was to have a small part of her break, nothing more and nothing less.
Slowly, the conversation became normal again. Both of us realized that we weren’t fighting because we didn’t love each other; we were fighting because both of us wanted each other’s attention in different ways. Before ending the conversation, I told her to continue her work peacefully, not to think about the argument anymore, and not to send any more messages until work was over.
I also told her that if she finished work early, around 6:30 P.M., we could speak peacefully without any disturbance. She agreed, we wished each other goodbye, and as always, we couldn’t end the conversation without saying, “Love you.” And just like that, the misunderstanding slowly came to an end.
After we exchanged our usual “Love you,” I started waiting for my Pappa’s call because I didn’t want the day to end with the misunderstanding between us. All I wanted was to hear her voice, explain everything properly, and solve the issue peacefully. Fortunately, her colleague wasn’t travelling with her today, and the moment I came to know that, I felt relieved because I knew we would finally get enough time to speak without interruptions.
As soon as my Pappa called me, the very first thing she said was, “Sorry.” Not just once—she said it at least four times. Hearing those words made me feel even worse because I never wanted her to apologize to me. I immediately stopped her and said, “Pappa, please don’t ask me sorry. It wasn’t just your mistake. I also made mistakes. I should have handled everything more softly because only because of my reaction did you become angry.”
But my Pappa still kept saying, “No… it was my mistake.” I convinced her that it wasn’t fair to put the entire blame on herself because relationships are never about one person being completely right and the other completely wrong. I made mistakes too, and if I had spoken more calmly, the situation would never have become this big. Both of us had our own reasons, both of us became emotional, and that’s all that really happened.
While speaking to her, I realized something that I had experienced before in my previous relationship but never understood this clearly until today. Long-distance relationships have a strange way of making even the smallest misunderstandings feel much bigger than they actually are. If we try to solve everything immediately after a fight, it often becomes worse because both people are emotional, both believe they are right, and both are trying to explain themselves at the same time. Instead of solving the issue, we unknowingly make it even bigger.
Today I understood something very important. If a fight happens, just leave some gap. Don’t immediately text, don’t immediately call, and don’t immediately try to solve everything. Give each other some time—maybe an hour or until both minds become calm—because something magical happens during that small gap.
Slowly, you begin to miss your partner. The anger starts disappearing, your ego becomes smaller, and love becomes bigger. That’s exactly what happened to me. After the fight, I slowly started missing my Pappa, and I kept asking myself, “Why am I even fighting with her?”
At the end of the day, she is going to be my wife. I’m going to marry her, and that thought is already fixed in both of our hearts. No misunderstanding can change that, no small argument can change that, and no one is going to change it either. So why should we keep fighting over something that, after a few hours, will look so small?
That is what I understood today. When we fight, both of us only see our own perspective. I think I’m right, she thinks she’s right, and both of us are simply trying to protect our own feelings. But after some time, when emotions become calm, the same issue suddenly looks so small, and today taught me that lesson.
To be honest, I shouldn’t have made such a big conversation out of that issue. I became disappointed because I only wanted her to spend a little time with me—that was all. But after ending the call and sitting alone, I started thinking about everything she does for me, and I realized how unfair I had been.
If I had to measure our relationship in percentages, I honestly feel that she sacrifices 80 or even 90 percent for me. Especially during weekends, it is so difficult for her to call from home, yet even if she gets just five seconds, she somehow finds a way to call me. Sometimes she calls just to hear my voice, sometimes just to ask whether I’ve eaten, and sometimes simply to say “Hi.”
Finding someone who values you like that is extremely rare in today’s generation. I genuinely feel proud to have a partner like her because she is someone who never wants me to feel lonely and always tries to make time for me whenever she possibly can. Looking back, I realized that during that particular moment, I completely forgot all those efforts and focused only on that one incident where I felt disappointed.
That’s where I made my mistake. I’m not trying to justify what I did because I know I was wrong. I’m a human being, and sometimes emotions take control. At that moment, my disappointment became bigger than my understanding, and that’s why I spoke to my Pappa in anger.
But immediately after that, I started missing her. I realized that instead of spending those few precious minutes fighting with her, I could have spent those same few minutes talking, laughing, and simply enjoying her company. That realization hurt me deeply because, at the end of the day, no matter what happens, I’m still going to spend my life with her. So why waste our limited time fighting?
When we started speaking again, my Pappa immediately asked me, “What happened? Why are you dull? If you have anything in your mind, please tell me.” This time, I didn’t hide anything. I simply poured out everything that had been building inside my heart—every feeling, every disappointment, every expectation, every fear. After saying everything honestly, I felt so relieved, as though a huge weight had been lifted off my chest.
I apologized to her once again and told her, “I’m sorry. I also made mistakes.” Then my Pappa explained her side too. She told me what she had been thinking and why she reacted the way she did. Once I heard her perspective, everything slowly started making sense, and our conversation became smooth again, just like it always does after we truly listen to each other.
This topic itself took quite a long time because both of us wanted to explain our feelings properly. On top of that, another problem made things even more difficult. Since I’m here in Dubai and she’s in India, we usually talk while she’s travelling home from work. Unfortunately, WhatsApp calls have recently been giving us a lot of trouble.
Because of the VPN, sometimes the calls freeze, sometimes the voice doesn’t come through, and sometimes the call disconnects completely. Whenever that happens, we switch to Google Meet, hoping it will work better. But today, even Google Meet wasn’t cooperating with us. Almost ten minutes went by just because of network problems, and I honestly don’t know whether it was our bad luck or simply poor internet.
Still, even if I get to speak with her for just five minutes, I’m happy. Those five minutes mean more to me than hours spent doing anything else. Sometimes five minutes with the person you love feels more valuable than five hours with anyone else. While talking to her, I silently thanked God. I don’t know whether it is a Hindu God, a Christian God, or simply destiny itself, but whoever it is, thank you for bringing my Pappa into my life. She is truly one of the greatest blessings I have ever received.
Soon, her stop arrived, and I asked her to call her brother to pick her up. After a few minutes, he came, and before ending the call, we made sure she was safe. We wished each other goodbye, and the call ended peacefully. I felt much lighter than I had just a little while ago.
After that, my roommate, another colleague, and I decided to go to a nearby tea shop. We had a cup of hot chai along with some snacks, and after such an emotional afternoon, that small outing felt refreshing. Before we reached the tea shop, one of our colleagues from Chennai called us, and we ended up speaking for nearly twenty minutes. The conversation was filled with fun topics, random office stories, and plenty of laughter.
Even while we were sitting at the tea shop, another call came. This time, it was one of my closest friends—honestly, he is more like my own brother than just a friend. He was the very first person who came to know about our love story, and he knows almost everything about us. We spoke about many interesting topics, laughed a lot, and by the time the call ended, my mood had become much better.
After returning to my room, the first thing I did was check my phone. From the time I left for the tea shop until I came back, my Pappa had sent me so many Instagram reels. As soon as I connected to the hotel Wi-Fi, I watched every single one of them and reacted to each one because I know she enjoys sharing those little moments with me.
Once I finished watching the reels, I texted my Pappa asking, “Did you have dinner?” and “What are you doing?” She replied saying that she had already finished dinner, and that made me happy. She also told me that she was watching a series. I don’t exactly remember the name, but I think it was something like “Must Date the Playboy.”
I smiled and told her, “Watch as many episodes as you want, but please sleep before 11. You have office tomorrow.” She laughed and agreed. As always, she promised me that before going to sleep, she would definitely text me. That’s something I admire about her because, no matter how tired she is, she never forgets to send me a good night message. It’s a small habit, but one that means so much to me.
Meanwhile, I had already ordered my dinner, and it was supposed to arrive in another ten to fifteen minutes. After finishing dinner, I planned to sleep early because today’s emotions had completely drained me. Although the day had been exhausting, I was grateful that we had spoken openly and ended it on a peaceful note rather than carrying the misunderstanding into another day.
While waiting for my dinner to arrive, I found myself thinking about everything that had happened today. One thing I strongly believe is that, in a relationship, the word “sorry” shouldn’t become a habit. Maybe others have different opinions, and I respect that, but for me, it’s a very heavy word. I don’t want my Pappa to keep apologizing because, in my heart, she isn’t just my girlfriend anymore—she is my future wife.
No matter what happens, whether we have a small misunderstanding or a big argument, I know one thing with complete confidence: she is mine, and I am hers. At the end of the day, we are going to build our life together, and that thought never changes. I trust her completely, and I know she will never betray me. That trust is enough for me to choose understanding over anger.
Life gives us only one important choice—to choose the person with whom we want to spend the rest of our lives. We don’t make that decision blindly; we make it after understanding, observing, trusting, and loving someone. I chose my Pappa because I believe she is the right person for me, and every day she proves that in countless little ways.
Looking back at today’s incident, I realized that I made one big mistake. I forgot the 90% of everything she does for me and focused only on the 10% that disappointed me. During weekends, she finds even five seconds to call me just so I won’t feel lonely. She always tries her best to make time for me, and yet I allowed one emotional moment to overshadow all those beautiful efforts.
Another lesson I learned today is that distance changes everything. If we had been in the same place, this misunderstanding would probably have ended within minutes. She would have smiled, I would have smiled, and we would have laughed about it together. But when hundreds of kilometres separate two hearts, even a tiny misunderstanding can feel much bigger than it actually is.
So today, I don’t want to remember the fight. I want to remember the lesson it taught me. Sometimes, giving each other a little time after an argument is better than trying to solve everything immediately. Once emotions settle, love naturally finds its way back, and the issue that once felt so huge suddenly becomes very small.
Before ending today’s diary, I just want to say one thing to my Pappa.
Sorry, Pappa. I should have understood your efforts before my emotions. Thank you for always trying to make time for me, for loving me the way you do, and for standing by me even when I make mistakes. I promise I’ll become better, because at the end of every argument, every misunderstanding, and every difficult day, my heart still chooses only you.